I have found Facebook (or the Facebox as my mom calls it) to be a mostly awesome thing. Everyone uses it, it is a great way to keep in touch with people and an excellent platform to share cool things. That said, even my best Facebook friends sometimes engage in behavior that not only diminishes the Facebox experience, but also is embarrassing for the perpetrator of the faux pas. So to help such folk see the light, here is my list of four things everyone needs to stop doing on Facebook (in no particular order). *Also, in no way is this directed at an any specific individual(s) who I might be friends with on the Facebox, but that might be a lie or not. Who knows.
1.) Use Status Shuffle
First off, I have never seen a Status Shuffle generated status that did not strike me as trite or inane. They are also totally unoriginal and I often have multiple friends posting the same Status Shuffle garbage at the same time. If you don’t have anything original to say, keep quiet.
2.) Repost Status Messages about Causes
Yes, cancer is awful. Yes, we should support our troops. No, posting the same message that everyone else is posting for any cause will not have any effect whatsoever without a direct link to a concrete action. If you care so much about a cause, there are multiple ways you can leverage that feeling to create a real outcome. Re-posting something as your status on Facebook is the lowest possible form of civic engagement. Also, no one thinks cancer is a good thing. There is no other side that needs convincing
3.) Fall for the “See the People Who Look at Your Profile” Apps
Here is a link to developer documentation that lists everything a Facebook app can do in terms of accessing your information. Do you see anything about there being some kind of magic functionality that would allow an app developer to track who visits your profile? That is because it isn’t possible and never has been. Do you know what it is possible? Getting narcissistic people to use an app that generates random pictures of their friends, assigns random visit counts to them, posts this information on their walls and then spams everyone associated with them. If you fall for this once, you might be stupid. More than once and you are unfriended without remorse.
4.) Type in All Caps
I feel like I shouldn’t have to explain this. Do folks really not know how to turn off caps lock or is holding down the shift key really that appealing? If you want to use all caps to emphasize one word or to be ironic, that might be okay, but probably not. Using all caps is the internet equivalent of yelling and a surefire way to let the rest of world know that you have absolutely nothing worthwhile to say, but you want to say it anyway, loudly.